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Sisters

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What fresh fuckery is this?

sisters-2015-kate-ellis-pazuzu-drug-dealer-john-cena-tina-fey-review

Kate Ellis (Tina Fey) & Pazuzu (John Cena), in Sisters, 2015.

I know, I know, it bothers some people when I use, or quote, profanity. But that quote is amazing because it parallels something Boromir says—in Fellowship of the Ring, obviously—”What is this new devilry?” But I never quote it correctly! I always say, “What new devilry is this?” I like to think that screenwriter Paula Pell thought that too.

So this movie was better than I expected. Certainly it was unrealistic but it was consistent in this level of unrealism. Best part of the movie — doot doodoo dooo, John Cena! His tattooed drug dealing TSA Agent was wonderful.  Also, I was impressed that Tina Fey showed a hitherto unseen acting range.

Trainwreck

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Mark Wahlberg is like 150 pounds! I’m 250 lean – I look like Mark Wahlberg *ate* Mark Wahlberg!

Amy Schumer and John Cena in Trainwreck. And yes, she is drinking Bandit, the travel friendly wine box.

Amy Schumer and John Cena in Trainwreck. And yes, she is drinking Bandit, the travel friendly wine box.

That quotation and that scene are worth 5 stars. Re-reading the lines on IMDb made LOL. Or COL (chortle out loud). While Amy Schumer may have written those lines and been involved in the scene as the movie’s star, I felt like the true star of the movie was the voice of the line above, John Cena. Now I will admit to being biased about Cena. But I used to hate this guy. Most adult wrestling fans still do. When Amy and John break up I was scared that he would be gone from the movie, and my fears were realized. Yes, there was also LeBron James and lots of sports references that my fiancée did not get, but James could not make up for the loss of Cena.

Three other thoughts: First, on Amy Schumer — while the movie is not deep, the things she puts herself through, and how semi-likable she makes herself, is very impressive. It would be unfair to pigeon hole her career now simply because we have not seen her stretch further yet. I did not expect Jim Carrey to ever show the range he did, going from comedies like Ace Ventura and The Mask to more challenging roles, like Dumb and Dumber. Second, I really liked the subdued performances from Brie Larson—female lead of 21 Jump Street, & Mike Birbiglia—Patrick in The Fault in Our Stars—as Amy’s sister, Nikki, and her husband.

Lastly, the rest of the movie was okay. It had too much cheese in it, but most of that compressed down into the ending. I literally shook my head watching it, wondering how they would wrap up the movie after such a lame scene, but nope. Still, most movies end poorly. If you do not believe me, then I will have to eventually write an essay about how even very good movies tend to end poorly. Think of the exceptions, the movies with great endings and I bet you will run out of movies quickly.